Monthly Archives: November 2010

Star-spangled scanner

O say can you see
By the flick’ring blue light
What the news channels hailed
From a TSA screening?

Whose broad thighs and bright scars
As he boarded the flight
Were so easily watched?
Even though it’s demeaning

In his bowels, some methane
Could have brought down the plane
If he’d saved that fart
Just to set it aflame

O say, isn’t it better
To submit and behave
Than be the land of the free
And the home of the brave?

James T. Cool

There was a brief period in pop-culture history when, to be a manly action hero, you had to be named James and have a one-syllable last name.

Sure, there were other shows and movies with manly heroes not named James, but how many new installments of those were still being made decades later?

Update: How could I forget James T. Hart? Now that was a manly action hero.

Half-life day

Today’s the half-life day
For Andrea and me
From now on we were “she and I”
For less then we’ve been “we”

Born ’66
Met ’88
And married ’99
So for 22
Of our 44 years
Life’s been extra-fine.

(And for 11
They’ve been heaven!)